Norse myth in which Thor dresses as Freya

One morning Thor woke up to find that his hammer was missing.  Well, this was a problem because his hammer is the most powerful weapon in all of Asgard, and in the wrong hands, well that would just be terrible.  Thor asked Loki if he could help him find the hammer.  Loki agreed, he suspected he might know who did it anyway.  Loki went to the giants and asked about the Hammer.  Thrym, one of these giants said, "Yeah, I stole the hammer, and you guys aren't getting it back unless you send Freya to marry me."

When Loki returned he told everyone, "look I've got some bad news.  Thrym has the hammer and he won't give it back unless we send Freya to marry him."  Freya was like, "Oh hell no." and the other gods agreed, they had too much respect for her to do anything like that.  Just then Loki had a plan, "What if we dressed Thor as Freya and sent him instead?"

So, Thor put on a fancy wedding dress and a veil and went to meet the giant Thrym.  When he arrived Thrym was super jazzed to get exactly what he had asked for and immediately handed the hammer over to Thor (who he thought was Freya).  At that moment Thor tore off the gown and bludgeoned the giants to death.

At this point in the telling of the story my sister snorts with laughter.  I am glad that she shares in my delight with this particular myth.  It is a story I tell as I explain why I am working on a rather elaborate doily- to make a veil (the pattern of the doily was chosen because it resembled a spider web...because, oh what a tangled web we weave... and so on).  I wondered many times during the process of making Thor...is this worth it?  Now that I've finished I think I can safely say, yes.  Yes, I think it was worth the frustration, the cramped hands, and the frown lines that were etched on my face as I worked on this beloved project.

The quiet sadness of doilies

This weekend I enjoyed a trip to Antique World. While my friend perused the vintage paperback booth seeking treasures in pulp and science fiction I planted myself in the booth containing doilies and buttons...among other things including, but not limited to vintage shoes and clothing, and Spice Girl dolls.  I spent enough time poring over the doilies that one of the women working that day stopped to ask if I needed help.  I told her thank you, no.  I was just admiring the beauty of the doilies, and imagining the hard work that went into making them.  I went on to tell her that I made these kinds of things myself and was looking for pattern ideas.  Perhaps I offered too much information, and she might have preferred a simple, "no thanks," but   I found myself oddly touched (in that way that indicates slight insanity) by these doilies.

Because I have logged countless hours, hook in hand, lovingly creating project after project, I have a profound appreciation for the art of the craft.  I have been told repeatedly- you should sell your work.  When I hear this my thoughts go immediately to the racks of afghans at thrift stores, and to the doily basket at Antique World.

I have always been overly sentimental.  For years I did not throw away shoes, even after they had broken down beyond wear-ability.  They had served me well, and deserved better than a flippant toss into the waste bin.  While I have worked to be more practical (with the expressed interest of not appearing on the television program "Hoarders") it still breaks my heart to think of the time, and love that goes into a handcrafted item like a blanket or doily, only to find it in what is essentially the waste bin of commerce- the second hand shops.  I want to buy all of these forgotten creations, give them homes where they will be appreciated.  Perhaps a Doily Rescue Mission is not anyone's top priority, but at the very least, let us recognize and respect the work that went into making them.

Epic Hats

It is that time of year again, time for the Staff Show.  This year I found myself scrambling to come up with something.  Although I have been busy all year crocheting enough to have made a house cozy, I realized that none of it seemed Staff Show worthy.  As I racked my brain trying to come up with something, my Darth Vader bust stared forward in silence, shrouded in a second Gilgamesh hat (the original was given as a gift to my sister).  Sure the Gilgamesh hat was all well and good, but there was something lacking...a yinless yang.

When I was a child my family would vacation in DC.  We frequently found ourselves at the Museum of Natural History where my sister and I would enjoy a little stop motion film in the Ancient Cultures section.  The film was an adaptation of the Epic of Gilgamesh and Enkidu.



It made an impact on me, and I assume my sister, who seems to share my brain waves in frequently erie ways.  I was impressed by the idea of the love that grew between these two men and the beauty of a story of transformation that ends with the bitter sorrow of loss.  It spoke volumes of the human condition...which has remained true for as long as we have shared stories. 

The Gilgamesh hat needed a companion, and so the Enkidu hat was created.

Alas, poor Yorick! I knew him

Alas, poor Yorick! I knew him, Horatio: a fellow of infinite jest, of most excellent fancy: he hath borne me on his back a thousand times; and now, how abhorred in my imagination it is! my gorge rims at it. Here hung those lips that I have kissed I know not how oft. Where be your gibes now? your gambols? your songs? your flashes of merriment, that were wont to set the table on a roar?

As I lay in bed one morning I thought, "I know, I'll make a Hamlet doll".  I had earlier attempted an Ophelia scarf, which ended up being a crochet fail.  I'm not sure what was missing, or what might have saved Ophelia (so to speak).  The scarf was ultimately dissected and repurposed for other projects.

At any rate, I set about to create Hamlet at the point where he discovers Yorick's skull in the graveyard.  I did not follow a pattern. He stands in my living room, contemplative and melancholy, keeping company with other crocheted sculptures born of my ennui.  

Baby Craft Project 4: Berry Baby Hat and Booties

This Baby Craft Project just might make my head implode from cuteness.  Number three nearly killed me, but when I finished the booties for number four I wanted to scream until my throat bled, they were so damn cute.  I have never made booties before, and now, its pretty much all I want to do.

This particular pattern was found in Crocheted Gifts: Irrestible Projects to Make and Give.  The book is edited by Kim Werker, but this design was by Chloe Nightingale.  The pattern is found on pages 31-35. 

I chose a fairly chunky purple for the "berry", I might venture to say that mine is a bit more eggplant than berry.  Regardless, it is still cute.

Baby Craft Project 3: Little Bo Sheep Hat

An over abundance of naps, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, and the excitement of completing part three of my Baby Craft Project kept me up to the wee hours of the morning.  This one came from the Sept/Oct 2011 issue of Crochet Today magazine, pp 82-84 and was designed by Noreen Crone-Findlay.

This was the first issue of Crochet Today that I received.  I thrill at its arrival, and wish it were more frequent.  This particular issue had Halloween items, and this baby hat was a particularly adorable one.  I did not have the right size yarn, which altered the gauge, and instead of a toddler hat it came out an infant cap.  That's ok,  a fuzzy white coat of sweater and baby is a little lamb.

This particular hat found a home with a dear friend, and her little lamb.

Baby Craft Project 2: Li'l Monkey hat and matching blanket

This second piece derives from Debbie Stoller's Stitch 'n Bitch: Happy Hooker and can be found on pages 274-279.  The pattern is credited to Carmen Watkins.

I'm not sure how I feel about sock monkeys.  I think they might be a little disturbing, and my suspicions were not helped when as I was working on this piece my roommate asked if I was going to give this to a baby that I hated.  He went on to note that the monkey looked less like the beloved sock monkey and more like a screamin blood-mouthed monkey with tiny sharp fangs.  Suffice to say, while I am generally pleased with the outcome of the piece(s) I am not as confident about it not giving babies nightmares.

I don't know, I think I would still give it to my own baby (if I had one).  It is kind of cool.

Baby Craft Project 1: Cupcake Bib

The first installment of my Baby Craft Project was the Cupcake Bib, which arrived in my latest issue of Crochet Today Magazine (Sept/Oct 2012, pp. 79-81).  The pattern is credited to Linda Permann. 

It was cute and easy to make, when I showed my roommate he worried that it might strangle the baby, so I was pleased to demonstrate that the strap was attached with a button.  I'm not sure how functional it is, since I have no toddlers to test it on, but at the very least it is cute.   I think that perhaps on a largers scale (by increasing the gauge) it might make a cute top for an apron.  If I were to make more, and I very well might, I would use Sugar 'n Cream yarn.

The Baby Craft Project

Sometimes I find it difficult to go to work where there exists no yarn or hooks and I have to spend 8 hours not crocheting. Oh sure I do other things that are more useful to the operation of my place of business, but let's just say that if I had a novelty t-shirt on right now it would read "I'd rather be crocheting"

Right now there is a baby blanket at home that begs to be finished.  It is part of an ongoing project.  The project began as an attempt to complete a pattern from each publication of patterns that I own.  It fell apart after the second pattern book provided little inspiration and an unfortunate crochet "fail" (granted I did pay all of $1 for it at a going out of business sale,and it does have some of the ugliest sweaters I have ever seen). Making sweaters is hard work, and so fussy. I finished most of it before I realized that I had miscounted, wrongly sized and so on. I'm also trying to use up my current supply of yarn, and the only color I had enough of was cream. The entire time I worked on the sweater I thought, this color should be used for doll heads...why am I wasting it on this lousy sweater?


So the project was altered.  Given that nearly 20 friends and acquaintances have or will have babies this year, and baby items are naturally small and completed more quickly (nearly instant gratification) I have decided to create at least one baby pattern from each publication.  I'm already on the second publication, and eager to start on the third.  Most, or all of the items will be for sale at Signifying Nothing.

Signifying Nothing

I am delighted to announce that I have finally listed items on Etsy at my shop: Signifying Nothing.

Many years ago my dear friend and I collected some handcrafted items and some trading cards (mostly of the Star Trek variety) and set about to sell them at craft bazaars across the countryside.  I'm not sure that we ever managed to sell any product.  Of course our product may not have been well matched to our audience. I had in all of my youthful creativity made jewelry with bizarre themes, most of which I've forgotten, although I am told the one piece that sold was a hair clip resembling flies on shit, and that my partner's mother bought it (bless her).  The fun of it was actually all in the time spent with my friend.  We would spend hours talking and and laughing, and I would set up a canvas and work on oil paintings in the the downtime, and there was nothing but downtime.

One bazaar had music piped throughout it.  Well, music, after a fashion.  It would be more apt to say that it had the song "Achey Breakey Heart" piped through it.  The song repeated a maddening number of times, until we were downright giddy at the absurdity of it.

The name of that shop had also been Signifying Nothing, a name we agreed upon because we were properly dramatic teens and appreciated Shakespeare's Hamlet and all of his dark brooding.  I was also a huge fan of Steve Martin and had watched LA Story many times, and anyone who has seen this film knows that he repeatedly references Shakespeare, claiming that he was originally from LA.

"Sitting there at that moment I thought of something else Shakespeare said. He said, 'Hey... life is pretty stupid; with lots of hubbub to keep you busy, but really not amounting to much.' Of course I'm paraphrasing: 'Life is a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing.'"
 
At seventeen or eighteen I felt that pretty much summed it up, and I guess I still feel that way, just the like would still find true happiness sitting at a flea market craft bazaar listening to "Achey Breakey Heart" and laughing with my friend.